Toxic wave rolls toward Chinese city

A 50-mile toxic slick of benzene and other chemicals is causing a massive freakout in Harbin, China. Thousands of fearful residents are fleeing in the face of the environmental scum that began rolling down the Songhua River after a series of explosions at a chemical plant upstream, The Financial Times reports.

The good news? The local Anheuser-Busch plant continues to crank out the brew, saying the city's water shutdown has "not significantly affected" production.

Beer aside, the Chinese nightmare makes America's Thanksgiving rush seem like a walk in the park. A nice, well-manicured park. In broad daylight. With a loyal pit bull at your side, and a well-stocked picnic basket over your arm.